The Case for Smut
In response to the question, “What’s your guilty pleasure?” I overheard the answer, “Oh, I don’t feel guilty about my pleasures!” I loved the sentiment of proudly embracing what brings you joy. One category that seems to fall into the “guilty pleasure” bucket (heavy emphasis on the guilt) is the genre of Romance, sometimes referred to as ‘smut’. But is this genre worthy of being tucked behind a different book jacket when reading in public, or the reluctant confession to what you’re currently reading?
For one thing, if you enjoy these books, you are certainly not alone. The Romance genre is the highest grossing fiction genre bringing in $1.44 billion in sales and in 2025 around 51 million units were sold in the U.S. alone. If these are still in “taboo” territory, why are they so popular?
A Whole New World: The Role of Exploration
In Western Culture, sexuality and sexual intimacy exploration can be fraught with rocky terrain. Boulders come tumbling down the mountain with messages of shame, embarrassment, and/or disgust. Distrust of your desires and sensuality trip up the feet. Sharp stones of mixed messages and demands for modesty poke underfoot. Between spotty sex education to high-control religious messaging to bad sexual experiences, there are few places that can feel safe and accessible to explore your innermost sexual desires, fantasies and what you take pleasure in. The Romance genre can offer a pressure-free space to get lost in a story that also explores explicit sexual pleasure. It can be at your own pace and allow for curiosity on a variety of topics, tropes, and kinks that you may not otherwise feel you could explore.
Reading Romance can provide alternative narratives to the sexually violent culture that real life often perpetrates. One aspect often found in Romance novels is the focus and elevation of women’s pleasure. This is not always the message or experience in real-life sexual experiences. Seeing this reflected in fiction without expectations and pressure can help bolster advocating for your own pleasure, or reframing pleasure in general.
While the genre is still heavily heterosexual in its romantic pairings, there are many authors and stories that center LGBTQ+ relationships (see resources below). The importance of seeing yourself reflected in stories is essential – and seeing yourself reflected in erotic love stories allows an opportunity for exploration while enjoying fictional adventures and escapades. This genre also centers the role of consent, which is usually shaky at best in other media such as TV series and movies, let alone cultural messaging.
Yes, Daddy! : The Role of Consent
Smut often weaves a consensual dance where explicit sexual scenes take place. It helps normalize conversations and the constant negotiation of consent throughout an experience. Romance navigates ongoing consent and communication by showing it adds to the steamy tension instead of detracting. Even when communication is humorously awkward or clunky, these stories help normalize that as part of necessary negotiation that still encompasses pages of pleasure. Western media often showcases the most amazing telepathic sexual scenarios where consent is magically assumed and communication would ‘ruin the moment’, but in real-life scenarios that modeling and message can lead to uncomfortable and pleasure-less sex to, at worst, sexual violation and trauma (intentional or not.)
These stories model being asked what you like and if you don’t know, having the shame-free space to explore and embrace your pleasure. Some sub-categories push the boundaries on consent, but authors will include trigger warnings so you can choose what you read and be as informed as possible. And if you encounter something you didn’t know was a “hard no”, you can close the book and walk away. That can feel much trickier to do in a real-life, happening-now, sexual situation. And sometimes you enjoy reading and imagining particular sexual exploits that you don’t feel the need or desire to pursue in real life – imagination and fantasy are part of our whole sexual selves.
Tentacles, anyone? : The Role of Fantasy
Romance has a wide variety of sub-categories such as Romantasy (blend of Fantasy and Romance), Paranormal & Monster Romance (Minotaurs, Kraken, Aliens – oh my!), the Omega-verse (generally wolf and other animal shifters), and “Why Choose” (usually a Female Main Character (FMC) with multiple, consensual, Male Partners (MMCs) – also referred to as a reverse harem.) This genre also varies widely in the explicit sexual content (often referred to as “spice” or depicted with chili peppers). The range can be from “closed door” with intimacy happening off-page to “Open Door” where sexually intimate content is abundant, graphic, and quite often taking center stage over the plot. This can be an accessible and fun way to engage with fantasies or learn more about what you like and don’t like to fantasize about.
A US Survey about sexual fantasies found that the second-most common fantasy was “being ‘forced’ to have sex” (61% of women, 54% of men and 68% nonbinary respondents). The most common fantasy was multi-partnered sex. If you find yourself squirming in your seat or scrunching your face at that, it’s important to understand the clear distinction that fantasies do not translate to real-life intentions or desires. Fantasy involves the imagination – allowing exploration of fictional sexual exploits and noticing what comes up. Dark Romance often dabbles in CNC (consensual non-consent) which plays with the boundaries of consent, force, and sexual pleasure. Reading dark romance can be a way to tap into that fantasy in a contained way. To enjoy the suspense, kink-forward, and/or taboo themes in a way that you get to control. Too much? Stop reading and take a break or add to the DNF (Did Not Finish) bin. There are still vast options of Romance genres to explore, but let’s remember not to yuck anyone’s yum.
And They Lived Happily Ever After : The Role of Predictability
A common critique is “these are all predictable and end in Happily Ever After which is cheesy.” Yes – they do! One hallmark of the Romance Genre is the requirement of a Happily Ever After (HEA) or a Happily For Now (HFN) scenario. The Romance Writers of America organization defines the Romance Genre as needing two basic elements: “a central love story and an emotionally satisfying and optimistic ending.” A book cannot be classified in the genre without these elements. Tropes (i.e. “one bed” “enemies to lovers” “forced proximity” etc.) are similarly part of the genre. These literary conventions create predictability in a world that is constantly barraging us with stressors, unpredictability, and challenges. There can be a certain sense of ease when reading Romance.
There is a place for the wrestling of ideas and reckoning with history in non-fiction, as well as the suspense and tragedy of a thriller or mystery novel. Smut, similarly, meets us in a space of sweetness, adventure, tension, and predictable plot lines. Pleasure and joy are important acts of resistance in a world that inundates us with systemic and institutional injustices – the antithesis of “ease”. It also begs the question why the hero’s journey – a fundamental literary convention – isn’t talked about the same way? “Ugh, another hero’s journey? How predictable!” Or why fictional series such as Game of Thrones are not classified as “smut”?
Patriarchy, that you?
The history and trajectory of patriarchy de-prioritizes women, minorities, and marginalized populations with well-being and pleasure near the bottom of that list. Case in point, the mapping and understanding of the clitoris did not happen until 2005. Pads were not tested with actual menstrual blood until 2023, which to the “surprise of researchers” is not the same as vascular blood (or whatever blue liquid they pour on them during the commercials.) While menstruating humans collectively rolled their eyes.
Romance, in the eyes of this Patriarchal culture, sees a genre for sappy women giggling over titillating nonsense. Or at worst, a threat. Talented Romantasy authors are creating epic adventures that rival series such as Game of Thrones or Brian Sanderson books, but they are taken less seriously. Romance authors get asked questions that other professional writers don’t seem subjected to. At a book event with Katee Roberts, I was struck by her answer to the question, “How do you respond when people ask if you are into the same sexual exploits that you write about?” She responded along the lines of, “I usually remind them I am a professional and writing is my craft, then I follow-up with – do you also ask murder mystery authors if they enjoy murdering people in their spare time? Or if Stephen King wishes he could be terrorized and tortured by monsters lurking in the dark?” Romance authors have to fight to be taken seriously and I am encouraged to see the acceptance of this craft gaining momentum (see: Heated Rivalry & The Love Hypothesis as recent TV adaptations). Highlighting the quality of emotional connections, character evolution, and steamy romance as worthy of our attention.
Overall, we are constantly saturated in messaging through media, culture, and social engagement which informs and influences how we exist in the world, so let’s make sure that we have the space to enjoy our pleasures – guilt free.
HOW MODERN THERAPY SEATTLE CAN HELP
Reading smut and loving spicy romance isn’t a reason to run to therapy. Enjoying erotic fiction is a normal, healthy way to explore fantasy, pleasure, and desire.
However, fiction can sometimes act as a mirror, bringing our real-world relational and sexual insecurities to attention. Some common ways clients make their way from smut to therapy might include:
Noticing a discrepancy in your partnered sexual relationship - you feel easy, effortless desire as you’re snuggled up with a spicy novel and a cup of tea, but you struggle to tap into that same desire with your partner.
Finding yourself feeling distressed, confused, embarrassed, or absolutely filled with shame over the tropes or dynamics that turn you on.
Getting curious about figuring out how to translate the fantasies you love reading into real-life communication and intimate moments
That’s where we come in. At Modern Therapy Seattle, we offer specialized sex therapy in Seattle for individuals and couples who want a judgment-free space to explore their internal erotic worlds. If you’re immersed in the world of romance and erotica, you don't need to censor yourself here - we have therapists on our team, like Jennifer, who completely get it and speak the language.
Sex therapy isn’t about fixing something broken. Sex therapy is here to help you untangle shame, bridge the gap between fantasy and reality, and create a sex life that feels authentic, consensual, and deeply fulfilling. Sounds kind of nice, right?
Modern Therapy Seattle offers in-person therapy in Seattle and telehealth therapy throughout Washington state.
If you’re ready to explore what turns you on without the weight of shame, or if you want support bridging the gap between your reading list and your real-world relationships, reach out to connect with Jennifer today!
[Get Started With Modern Therapy Seattle →]
This article is for educational purposes and is not a substitute for individualized mental health care.
Referenceshttps://www.scientificamerican.com/article/no-one-studied-menstrual-product-absorbency-realistically-until-now/https://booketic.com/romance-novel-sales-statistics/NCSF (Davidson, 1985; Lehmiller, 2018; Pelletier & Herold, 1998)https://annerollins.com/2026/02/15/does-romance-require-a-hea/